Where in the World?

The fear of flying was so intense for me that it probably bordered on a phobia. I used to be so terrified of flying that sometimes I had trouble even getting out of the car and then I would need assistance to walk to the terminal. Once I got on the plane, my hands gripped the arm rests until my knuckles turned white. That was before the engines were turned on. The rest of me turned white just about the time we taxied down the runway.

There were several times I got nauseated, dizzy and then I had to use the paper bag supplied by the airline for those “special” occasions. Embarrassingly, one time I remember being so dizzy while I was vomiting that a passenger next to me actually held me upright in my seat, so I wouldn’t fall over. (Thanks to whoever that was! I don’t remember your face.)

Last year I flew over 108,000 miles while reading books and watching movies. Since 2001, I’ve averaged about 80,000 miles a year in air travel. How the heck did I get from phobic to absolutely no issues at all? I’m still trying to figure that out myself.

Fear of flying for me was caused by several things. If you have this fear, you may relate to my fear of flying list:

1. I was not in control of the plane as I would be in my car.
2. Motion sickness was common for me. This added to the fear of flying because it was another thing that made me feel out of control.
3. The thought of spinning wildly out of control as you plummet from 38,000 feet and then slam into the earth, would almost put me into a coma.
4. At the time, I was also terrified of dying.
5. Any bumps or turbulence would set off an immediate sense of impending doom or death.
6. I didn’t want to eat or drink as that would mean I may have to use the airplane restroom, which meant I had to unbuckle my tightly pulled across-my-lap seat belt.
7. I had experienced some fairly intense and terrifying, what I like to call incidents, on previous flights. Still to this day, getting on a prop plane is not something I do.

When I changed jobs in 2001, the position required lots of travel. I actually was looking forward to it, but hadn’t yet figured out how to overcome the fear of flying challenge. I also had not flown very much during the previous years. As you can imagine, I was quite anxious about the entire prospect.

So, I convinced myself that Dramamine was the solution. It would help with the motion sickness and if I was lucky it would render me slightly unconscious or very sleepy. So, I started to fly more. I took the Dramamine. It seemed to work. I had less anxiety and very little motion sickness. But the trick was that I was getting on a plane. In other words I was facing the fear head, albeit with a little Dramamine to help.

After about a year or so, I tried to read on the plane. The first few times I got dizzy, so I stopped. But, I persisted and eventually I could read while flying. Next step was the non-drowsy Dramamine formula.

About 2 1/2 years ago, I started using the wristbands that take advantage of an acupressure point on the inside wrist to alleviate nausea. I was surprised that it worked. I stopped taking Dramamine. Sometimes now I forget to wear the bands and only remember after I land. For the fear of dying, I found a good counselor and worked through those issues.

As you can see, it was a gradual process utilizing several techniques with a healthy dose of determination. Now flying is not a barrier to my intense desire to see the world.

Michael

Day 2 in Paris (Sept. 26th, 2006) was a whirlwind day. We covered a lot of ground and had our patience tested many times, but only because of never being in the city. The people we met on our journey were quite lovely, very friendly and quite helpful. Which brings me to a point I’d like to discuss.

As friends and acquaintances I know found out that I was going to Paris, I heard one story after another about how rude the Parisians could be. Only one person out of many said anything different than that negative story. So, I was presented with an excellent opportunity to believe what others were telling me or create my own story. So, as we traveled the city, not speaking very much French nor speaking it well, we met one wonderful person after another. It was the exact opposite of all the stories I had been told. From the warmness of the cafe owner near Gare de Lyon to the old lady who didn’t speak a bit of English and helped us get on the right bus to where we wanted to go. And the list goes on with people that showed a wealth of generosity, wit, humor, helping hands and a welcoming air about them.

So, this entire adventure made me think of an old parable. Unfortunately I can’t remember where I heard it.

At the top of a high mountain pass a traveler comes across an old man sitting on the side of the road. You can see down in the valley the lights of a village. The traveler asks the old man, do you know what that town is like down there? The old man says, “Tell me about the village you came from.” The traveler tells a very negative story about how the town is riddled with crime, how the people are all depressed and how a dark cloud seems to hang over the village.” The old man tells the traveler that the village in the valley down below is much the same, so he better find another town to visit.

A little while later, another traveler stops near the old man. He asks, “What is that village like down in the valley?” Again the old man says, “Tell me about the village you came from.” This traveler tells a story of a town of very happy people, where everyone helps each other, the children sing and play in the streets, and there is very little crime.”

The old man says, “You’ll find much the same in the village down below. Enjoy your stay.”

I like this story because it is a great example of how your attitude dictates and creates your experience. I feel that is what I had to do to overcome the negative stories I heard before my trip. By being open and believing that I would have a great time and meet wonderful people, the experience I had was quite different.

Have a great day.

I absolutely love to travel. I find it intensely satisfying, rewarding and it just makes me happy! I don’t care if it is a 30 minute drive to have a nice hike in the woods or something much longer like flying to Australia.

I am always thinking about who I might meet, what adventures will I have, what new things will I see, what new foods I can try and etc. I have been fortunate that my current career has given me the opportunity to travel a lot. It was my primary reason for taking that position. I have been able to travel to six countries (2 more next week!) and 43 states.

Each trip has had its own “flavor.” No two have been the same. I met one of my best friends on a flight from London to Boston after we both got upgraded and then sat next to each other. From that one “chance” (I don’t believe in chance, by the way) meeting, I have experienced things and met people that have fundamentally changed my life for the better. It’s part of why I’m the way I am today. In other words, I’m just happier overall.

Traveling has also allowed and helped me overcome a number of basic fears I use to have. One of them was a serious fear of flying. In the past, I actually needed help to walk to the gate from the car. But no more. I overcame that fear one trip and one flight at a time. Now, several years later, I fly 50K – 100K miles per year.

I think it is a good think to get out of your “town.” See some new places, talk to some new people, get some different perspectives, shake up your comfort zone. All this helps to keep one centered and not affected by the changing world around us. Change and newness become the norm. Comfort and freedom are the outcomes.

Is this for everyone? No, but you can at least take a trip to a neighboring state or city. See something new. Eat a local food or delicacy. Find out about the local history. Take a walk in a local park. Visit an art gallery. Go fishing. Take some photos. Anyway, you get my point.

I’m in Warsaw, Poland this week and I’m looking forward to meeting my adventure whatever that becomes.

Have a great day!